Jealousy obviously exists in many forms and contexts but I think people look at it most often from the point of view of the person who claims to be wrongly accused, but the person who is ill with jealousy has a very different story, one that should not be disregarded when viewing the situation from outside.
For me, at one point, Jealously was born out of being starved of what social nutrients I defined as necessary ingredients to be reassured that my relationship does indeed exist in the form that I had come to believe it did.
It is normal not receive certain actions from another party at times due to circumstance, but it is another to watch it be given to something or someone else instead of you. To be consistently reminded of this, carelessly compared, or told it is no big deal when you attempt to talk about what you are feeling only adds more negative emotions and ideas, including distrust, and the disconnection between what you are verbally told and what you physically see happening right in front of you becomes more evident.
As the actions compile so does the fear-driven paranoia. You have been told that you are misinterpreting the situation and that all is just as normal, but you cannot help but to understand that the mind is, if anything, a function of the body. A Function that has its own agenda to maintain and conscious reasons to maintain it, but it also does not have a consistent conscious awareness of everything happening in the body. So if the behavior continues either you are dealing with a mind that is completely unaware of it’s own body’s intentions or you are dealing with a liar. Either way, there is opposing data being received, one from the eyes and one from the ears. Personally I would rather loose my hearing than my sight, so you will understand why for me visual cues trump audio ones.
From there you start asking yourself, well then, if all the previously received reassurance as to the nature of this relationship is no longer reserved for me like it was, then I am not in the relationship I thought I was in. Not that change is a bad thing but if I don’t like this new multi-dimensional relationship, then hanging around just makes me the fool.
Future jealousy understands the fool in the end and thus inhibits a purpose in trying again.
/dɪˈzɜrv/ Show Spelled [dih-zurv] Show IPA verb, -served, -serv⋅ing.
–verb (used with object)
1.to merit, be qualified for, or have a claim to (reward, assistance, punishment, etc.) because of actions, qualities, or situation: to deserve exile; to deserve charity; a theory that deserves consideration.
–verb (used without object)
2.to be worthy of, qualified for, or have a claim to reward, punishment, recompense, etc.: to reward him as he deserves; an idea deserving of study.