Tag Archives: different times

Work

Work

The eulogists of work Behind the glorification of ‘work’ and the tireless talk of the ‘blessings of work’ I find the same thought as behind the praise of impersonal activity for the public benefit: the fear of everything individual. At bottom, one now feels when confronted with work- and what is invariably meant is relentless industry from early till late- that such work is the best policy, that it keeps everybody in harness and powerfully obstructs the development of reason of covetousness [this means: inordinately or wrongly desirous of wealth or possessions; greedy.] of the desire for independence. For it uses up a tremendous amount of nervous energy and takes it away from reflection, brooding, dreaming, worry, love, and hatred; it always sets a small goal before one’s eyes and permits easy and regular satisfactions. In that way a society in which the members continually work hard will have more security: and security is now adored as the supreme goddess. And now – horrors!- it is preciously the “worker” who has become dangerous. ‘Dangerous individuals are swarming all around.’ And behind them, the danger of dangers: the individual.” -Nietzsche

In “life as viewed by Me” I continuously make the mistake of assuming people know what I know, or at least can relate to where I’ve learned what I know, which is true in many many respects but not all, and most importantly not always the issues i view as important.

On a typical day I, luckily, drive traffic free to the office, arriving within 3 to 8 minutes late (I’m never quite sure because all my clocks show different times. I do this to trick myself into thinking I am late when I really am not, so then I will be closer to on-time, but the real effect is that I’ve made myself confused as to what time it really is and therefore give up trying to figure out the time…anyways…) Once arriving at work I grab some tea or coffee then start working on the task at hand.

Essentially something needs to be done, pieces need to be organized and processed into a usable and efficient package. Accomplishing this small goal is much the same regardless of what the job is. First I scan the chaos of raw material to pick out the most obvious parts to start with. Using my tools I process the raw materials and after X amount of time have transformed them relevant to the blueprints of what I was instructed should be the finished product.

The repetition of this robot process leads me to grasp to any distraction which provides and excuse for temporary relief of the monotony. My grumbling belly, chance for conversation with my neighbor, the beep of a text message, all these I either welcome the chance and opportunity to tend to or I make a mental note that nature is calling and I must give into the interruption sometime in the near future.

The hour for lunch is my time to indulge in myself, to read and daydream about how I would react if life were this other way or that, or if so and so was here, or what is really going on. I love to spend it alone with my books and only rarely do I find someone else worthy enough to spend this time with.

I leave work at exactly the minute I am allowed to depart and I drive home in a daze, carefully sucking in the life that has been ignored and put on a shelf for the last 10 hours.

“A traveler who has seen many countries and peoples and several continents was asked what human traits he had found everywhere; and he answered: men are inclined to laziness. Some will feel that he might have said with greater justice: they are all timorous [this means: subject to fear; timid]. They hide behind customs and opinions. At bottom, every human being knows very well that he is in the world just once, as something unique, and that no accident, however strange, will throw together a second time into a unity such a curious and diffuse plurality: he knows it, but hides it like a bad conscious – why? From fear of his neighbor who insists on convention and veils himself with it. But what is it that compels the individual human being to fear his neighbor, to think and act herd-fashion, and not to be glad of himself? A sense of shame, perhaps, in a few rare cases. In the vast majority it is the desire for comfort, inertia – in short, that inclination to laziness of which the traveler spoke. He is right: men are even lazier than they are timorous, and what they fear most is the troubles with which any unconditional honestly and nudity would burden them. ” Nietzsche

Starting Things Properly

Starting Things Properly

I’ve been flashing backwards and drawing parallels between similar events that happened at different times and I’ve come to the conclusion (with my capitalist hat on) that starting things with proper footing will, for the most part, be the best way to map out a smooth course.

If you’re not one to want smooth courses in life then, well, you’re ridiculous because you can’t make your WHOLE life difficult for yourself can you? Maybe you can, but do you want to? I get exhausted and in the process exhaust my fellow bipeds when I’ve made things more difficult than I could have. I agree that sometimes difficulty is actually a blessing, especially on road trips where difficulty brings about unexpected adventure…. but there are somethings, for me, that will be adventure enough without reoccurring problems and bad behaviors stemming from not having started off with the correct footing.

The way I see it is that if part of my life starts off one way, in one set of circumstances then it might end a similar way when a new part of life starts. Happens all the time with hobbies. I was making a pair of pants once and they ended up not fitting properly so I never finished them, in my frustration over why I couldn’t get the pattern to fit right I started crocheting a scarf. So I used my new absorption in the new hobby as an excuse not to confront issues with the previous one.

Eventually I had 5 or 6 unfinished projects laying around that I had spent money on and every time I looked into the sewing room there they were calling out “FINISH ME, FINISH ME.” But when the going got difficult I put them aside in that dark room and used another project to give me something to look forward to. It was only way later that I actually sorted through all those unfinished high school projects and finished them. Now I’m free and can start a new project for the sake of getting it done instead of trying to distract me from where I screwed up in the past

Works the same with relationships…..say, for example, I make a new friend, but our friendship actually evolved because the other party was angry at their best friend. The activities that my new friend and I do began around him telling me the horrible side of his soon-to-be-former-friend.

I listen while my new friend tells the soon-to-be-former that he is doing their favorite activities with me instead and am relieved when his former friend declines the invitation to join us. I listen as my new friend hangs up the phone after saying bye in a seemingly friendly voice and says “Bitch, Ha!” Nonetheless he’s hanging out with me and we’re having a good time so what’s the harm? Their problems have nothing to do with me. Then time passes and that whole situation is practically forgotten in our minds… until… until… I notice the same behavior but this time I am on the other end… I am the soon to be former friend.

Had I not been dealing with the same objects in the respect to each other then this theory would fall apart. So I see it happen, I know how my friend treated his former best friend, I was there I saw what role I played and I can see who is playing the former Me. So in this case I would recommend, not starting a relationship of any kind with someone who uses you as backup to finish off another because in my experience it has too much potential to be a reoccurring behavioral response to certain conditions (if it worked before, why not again?) and you will either see it coming or wonder what point in your life you’ll be at when it does and who else it will effect.

Call it capitalist efficiency if you like, or call it peace of mind, or call it being able to finish what you start, or call it shaping your life into what you want it to be, or call it not being weak, or call it placing reliability on yourself instead of on other things or people…. anything except “just because.”