Tag Archives: distraction

We all have a Cinderella complex

We all have a Cinderella complex

Men like to tell women that fairy tales don’t exist.  I believe that this happens because women are more prone to wearing their emotional needs on their sleeves.  It is easy to walk up to someone and tell them fairytales don’t exist when they have “Looking for my dream man” written on their T-shirt or Stilettos.  But we all have our fairytale dreams where we envision our savior coming down and taking away some sort of internal torment.  For many they turn to Jesus and say that the savior has already come, we have just to learn from his teachings.  Others hope for the future to bring us what we desire.

We sit and dwell and work out all the details so that we don’t miss the opportunity once he presents himself.  In every fairy tale there is a discomfort that drives us to want relief.  Prolonged exposure to the discomfort makes us externally accepting of the situation but internally scheming for our way out.  Unfortunately for us women, men are always a disappointing solution because they don’t honestly provide relief, they provide a distraction that in itself causes more problems.

 

 

Problems with Human Interaction

Problems with Human Interaction

Games

Some people’s good moods can be a subconscious trap to find more reasons to be pissed off at me later.

Excessive addiction to knowledge which supports preconceived notions, surf the Internet and you will find the answer you are looking for.

Rebellion as a cure for discomfort

Inertial behavior

Inability to know all the details necessary to make educated decisions, or rather belief that one has enough information to make such decisions.

The belief in the misconception that there is a “normal state of mind.” This encourages people to recognize how they aren’t good enough and thus keeps them working harder at tasks which they think are in line with what is “Normals, ”in an attempt to be something other than what they themselves would otherwise, naturally be.

Lack of education about who educated people are and what has driven them to gain an education.

The lack understanding that doctors are in control of what denotes mental illness and lack of the realization that that is only one opinion which is just a measure of control over the population.

Educated people believing that they in fact, are now better because they know more about a subject, yet their knowledge is still just bias on the grounds that it was sought out to fulfill a purpose, yet until one is actually knowledgeable of the subject, they had no idea what exactly they were getting themselves into and perhaps in the process their original goal has been abandoned. The idea of an education also is that you are being trained to do a task and distraction from that task is ingrained to be avoided on the grounds of society needing you to complete tasks with your expertise. Road blocks (especially those imposed by people more so than standardized tests) to your ultimate goal should be read into with extreme detail because it is most likely that there is something about you which is not conducive with the profession. These things can be changed and often simply require a bit more growing up, but that takes you being willing to change yourself to yet another group of people’s definition of normal. Which if you are one who is on a mission to be “normal” then this is definitely the profession for you.

On Mixed Emotions and Anger as Unfulfilled Desire

On Mixed Emotions and Anger as Unfulfilled Desire

While listening to ‘The Wind’ by Cat Stevens and organizing the sewing room – which is a huge huge project – I was thinking about my life (as I tend to do every minute I find a distraction that doesn’t require socializing) and following down my internal checklist of ‘happiness with myself’ and making mental notes of how I could have better handled certain past situations that are probably of highly insignificant value to most others, but I try to get detailed in my behavior so as not to confuse others on my intentions, but uh…I can’t seem to manage this, I seem to be running a program in opposition to what I really feel. This ‘program’ of reactions really only happens when a select few emotions are in the dominate forefront of my life. For example, since I’ve been home I have this cloud of anger hovering over me. Sure at times I feel happy or excited or content or any other emotion that isn’t compatible with anger, but that unfulfilled desire, that hole of not getting or being able to grasp what I had set my heart on, bubbles up from time to time and causes me to do all sorts of strange behaviors that are seemingly unconnected to anything in the present moment.

Someone once told me that it is ‘crazy’ to cry at things like an aluminum coke can flying onto the hood of my car on the freeway. After assessing that the damage was barely noticeable, I admit, the tears were perhaps unnecessary, but they were the bubbling up of my ‘fear’ of having to drive a shitty looking car around because, at the time, I, didn’t have enough money to fix it. Now I realize that, no, I’m not crazy, I’m just more emotional about things I care about and spend a lot of effort taking care of. There is nothing wrong with that, I just need to save the tears for more empathetic company, which I was really good at, but I just thought, in this instance, I was safe to display my real emotions. Or perhaps I just wanted to feel safe and more connected by doing so, so I gave it a try.

Now the real issue is, what is wrong with driving a shitty looking car around? That type of thinking escaped me in the moment; my arrogance perhaps needed a bit of a tune down.

So, to sum it up: emotions like fear, anger, happiness, etc. sometimes hold a dominate grasp on different chunks of time in life, get out of control because they are stronger for the time, bubble out, and leave me trying to explain how I have been misunderstood. After-the-fact explaining gets difficult because there tends to be many, many things going on in the mind in split seconds that really have no words, at least not until years later.