True, I am one to often believe that wenching and complaining is quite necessary and a good way of simply expressing frustration over issues beyond ones control. But honestly, I can’t listen to the same stuff every occurrence. How is it possible that people forgot how to grow? No, Once you hit 21 you’re not necessarily set in your ways, you do not have to be the way you are forever, unless, of course, you are lazy or just in need of habits to use as a source of identity and a feeling of value for oneself.
I met a guy in Australia, old guy, name is John; I loved walking by my local pub and sitting down for a beer and a chat with John under the heat lamps. Like most guys, John had other women, same as me, who stopped by for a beer and a chat with him. I didn’t mind that I was just one of many, I felt honored actually. You see, John wanted to be known as: “John, you know, the guy always sitting out, drinking a beer at the Quarrymans Hotel.” That was John sole purpose… to be ‘that’ guy out side of a pub the the locals knew about and would remember (Keep in mind this was Sydney, not BFE).
I bring up this story because it has to do with controlling which niches one places oneself in. Being a creature of intense habit, I can detect- all to well- when someone needs a new habit adjustment, including myself. There comes that point when one is still playing the old program simply for the sake of being in the habit of filling a redundant scene in ones life with something and not getting anywhere, because ‘I just don’t know what else to do with myself.’ I.E. Holidays, yawning in conversations when you’re not tired, constantly making your life difficult so you don’t have to focus on other things, (insert annoying habit here), etc………
From this point one can go in basically two directions:
1. Don’t let on that the habit was ever there and change it so subtlety that no one notices until the change has fully been made, and then act as though the new part of you was there all the time, you just pulled it out of your sleeve all breezy-like. Brilliant. Wow. Stand up and clap for yourself.
2. Make a big deal out of your change and tell the whole world how you’ve wasted so much time and now these are all the things you’re gonna do and all the things you’re gonna accomplish. Not my style because it is only brilliant if you actually pull it off… and if you take this approach… I (or someone else) will steal your ideas (if I like them) and pull them off before you just to see if I can or steal the glory. As the Godfather said: “Trust people, but also be wary of them. Don’t let them know what you are thinking too much.”
Where does wenching fit into all of this? Wenching is one thing ones does when one is aware of a habit, but fears not being able to pull off a remedy for this little hole you’ve dug yourself. That is why I prefer option 1, from above, given a choice, because I have an annoying habit of fearing failure and don’t like others to see where I’ve failed- assuming they know what constitutes failure to me. Avoiding option 2 to also avoids compound failure and constant changing of plans, which makes one look weak and a bit delusional.
Most importantly, redundant wenching also is a result of hoping others will clean up your messes for you. This lazy luxury is not only for people who believe they are superior to the problem at hand and so feel they have the ‘right’ to wench about it, but also the ability to make it someone else’s problem. Tact, in this case, is definitely something that should be taught better on TV. Or maybe it is just me who has a hard time handling people swimming though dirty laundry while trying to have a conversation…. heaven forbid a tide come in.